Sid-plies

Was off to a sale today and got a 'batman' night suit for the little one. Sid was over the moon when he saw it. He threw himself on me and said "Thank you. I like you soooo much mamma'. Holding him, I asked,

Me:  When do you not like mamma?
Sid:  When God will take you away. Hmm.. I will pray to God to not take you. He will tell me that you are a big boy now and you don't need mom/papa anymore. Tch-tch, But I will (try) tell him that I am a baby still so leave her for some more time. He sometimes will listen.
 Me: ?!

I was rolling on the floor laughing.

 

Unconscious

We went to the hospital last week to meet an uncle who was very sick. Sid was behind me wanting to  know why what and how it happened. Quickly told him that he was unconscious and so the doctors were monitoring him.

Yesterday he came up with this "Mamma, I think my tummy is 'unconscious'. Can we go to the hospital? "

I was unconscious by then.

Weather me

I am not a cold person. Literally. I cannot stand cold weather, cold drinks, ice-creams.
I prefer the warmth. The warm climate before spring/summer breaks. It ideally is the winter months down south. From where I come, the weather stays between warm, hot and hottest. Showers for a week at max.


Pleasant is when I don't bundle myself up or sweat like a sprinter. Clothes dry well :). Less health issues. All life forms look happy. And so do I.

Little Sid is just my opposite. He sweats when it is 18 c! Needs a fan even when it is (really)cold. Hardly needs or wears a jacket. People look at me as Cinderella's stepmom when I take Sid out in a T-shirt and me in a heavy jacket and hood. We are a scene when we sleep. I am in my gears down to socks and use the thickest blanket. Sid just sleeps in his pajamas.

It took me a while to understand that he was different and let him go without winter wears. Now I don't trouble him with my cold fears.

Stepping out

There are certain topics that I am not open about. Like achievements-bucketlist-regrets.. lot more. Maybe because these are emotions I keep generally bottled. Or maybe because one is not used to people wanting to know it. More reasonable reason  of course is the thought that someone might read and know you better!

Truly speaking, I feel a physical discomfort writing on such topics. A certain kind of tightness. So here is an attempt to let go and step out of my comfort zone.

There are two moments that stand out when I think of achievements. One was in my teens, I was part of Adult literacy programme. After a few months of coaching adult labourers(women working in salt pits) they started reading and counting. For us, literate adults, reading is probably like brushing. It is the most natural process.  But for someone who could never understand anything written, being able to read, is a liberating feeling.  They came up everyday with new things they read or found. It was such a memorable journey for all of us.  They could board the bus without asking anyone. Few started reading newspapers/stories/posters and counting the units in the bill. I remember one akka telling that she couldn't stop picking up rags to read them! That I could change their life in the tiniest way possible was to me an "achievement". I felt very happy.

The next and most obvious is the moment when I saw my little one the first time. The first thought that struck me was a sense of complete 'Awe' - 'Miracle'. And that I was part of the natural miracle was an achievement. Holding him was bliss.

Phew! Got it out :) 

Introspection - 2013

Looking back, the last year was good. I don't remember jumping in joy or wallowing in sorrow.

Few memories from 2013
1. Trip to Munnar and Coorg. Loved Munnar for its serenity.
2. Job change and hectic days for Papa.
3. Kutty Golu. Small get-togethers.
4. Homewards in November. Turned out to be a sick leave.
5. Started jogging for more than a mile. And it stopped there :(
6. Rekindled the love for kolam/Rangoli. They now adorn my doorstep for margazhi.
7. Read a few books - does 3 fall under few ?
8. Tried new recipes.
9. Tried to capture most of Sid's milestones here.

Rest seem to have faded into oblivion! So stopping it here.
 

Resolutions

Making and writing down the  New Year Resolutions was one more tradition I had followed for a long time. Somewhere down the line, the writing part was gone. Now the resolutions are gone as well.

The one resolve I do everyday (New Year or not) is to eat healthy and consume no/less/moderate sugar. And I pretty much follow it through the day, other than the times I gorge on sweets and binge on snacks ;-) So have decided to stay away from that resolve.

One other positive thing I have been trying for a while is to live in the moment. Minimal 'replay' of past incidents and no 'coming up' future shows in my mind. Just living that moment. Zen calls it mindful living. Have been reading the blog for years now and found it extremely helpful. Especially at workplace. Now I am a home bird and have all the time to think of everything else other than that moment. Maybe I should tie a ribbon to remind myself to be there where I am.

Will watch the progress I make on 'being there' and report next week.

Happy New Year

Happy New Year to all ..or well to whoever reads this other than me.

I have my little one sitting right next to me insisting that I write his name first.  This blog is for you Sid.

This definitely is  one year when I zombie walked into the New day. Last day of 2013 was so tiring (read non stop snacking at relatives) that I could not keep awake till 12 to see the clock trickle into the New Year. That was one tradition broken. But New Years Day dawned with pleasant surprises.  I  met my cousin sister and her kids after a long time. We had a nice time catching up and kids played together. Sid enjoyed cutting cake and singing Happy New Year loudly.

We came back from my native today. I was about to hit the bed after a tiring 8 hour journey, but thanks to Ani, couldn't go to sleep.  I have promised her a post everyday. So pulled myself (Sid tagged along) up to write one. Now isn't that a good start to a wonderful year ?

As I am writing this post, Sid is entertaining himself by mock-pressing the clothes I had so meticulously folded. He is looking so innocent and cute, lost in his world, talking to himself.

Life IS beautiful with you Sid.